Rules of Life for Starting Over and Achieving Happiness

It's a sad part of life, that most people don't realize until a tragic life event happens. But not everyone is given the chance to grow old. Once you realize this, you then start to appreciate every single person in your life and every single day that you wake up and get out of bed. It took me exactly 49 years to the day to realize this statement and then several more to start living it.

Not everyone will grow old, I know this for a fact

May 1st, 2018, Waking up that morning, that was the morning I realized my life would never be the same again, but this time in a good way. My wife and I had been talking about making some life changes as we both agreed that the lifestyle we were living was no longer suited for what we wanted out of life. Sitting down with our morning coffee like we usually do every morning. We made the decision, that this would be the day we would take control and start the process of winning our lives back. I didn't want to work another 15 years at a job that I didn't enjoy, and neither did my wife

When I accepted a job position, it was for one of two reasons, either to increase my salary or advance my career. When I reflect on my career, some of the companies I've worked for, and the things I've accomplished. It's sad for me to admit this now, but at best, I tolerated everything just for a nice paycheque which was the only satisfaction I received, was seeing those numbers on that piece of paper. It was also the morning when the fog in my head cleared from the events from three years prior. Though I had moved on from this tragic life event. Some things in life will stay with you forever, and as well they should

This tragic event started the same day I turned 49. This was also the same day my wife of fourteen years was diagnosed with terminal cancer. We were given a timeline and informed that she only had at best, months to live. It was words you never thought you would ever hear.

When someone sits you down and tells you something like that. The feelings and emotions that you go through, no words can accurately describe the experience. Your life is changed forever. in just a matter of seconds. all of our plans for the future were now gone. That was also when my eyes opened up to the fact that not everybody is allowed the opportunity to grow old, so appreciate every moment of your life. It was then that I realized I needed to change my outlook on life and how I was only existing and not living and enjoying life to the fullest as life for us at that time consisted of working and saving for the future. When we left the hospital that day. I had another more important priority now. That was to give my wife the best life possible in the short amount of time we now had left together. Over the next three months. We were able to create some of the best memories of my life. These memories will live inside of me for life, and then she was gone and became my angel.

Before receiving this news, we had a 10-year plan, to work as much as we could and build up our savings and net worth so we could enjoy a modest lifestyle in retirement from the fruit of our hard work and sacrifices. After my wife had passed. Work then became my life as well as my savior. In that time of grief, work also became my identity. For the next two years, that was all I knew, work.

Seven years later, I was reflecting on my life during that period and everything that had happened up until now. I didn't realize it, but I was now living my life by these eight life rules and didn't know it.

• In order to have a future, make peace with the past.

• Why should I care about what others think of me, it's none of my business

• Time heals almost everything, so give things time to heal

• Don't prioritize making money and purchasing then next latest and greatest item. Prioritize making memories and not owning what you might think is a status symbol

• Live your life for you, don't compare your life to others and their status.

• It's okay not to know all the answers, as the answers will come in time, if you take the time to listen.

• No one is in charge of your happiness except you. But you can destroy someone else's happiness.

• Take every opportunity to enjoy life, your life is on a countdown, and you are racing towards the with no brakes. Appreciate the time you have

Prior to going through this life event. I was lying to myself. I had convinced myself to work a few more years, pay down the mortgage and debt as well as some bills, and even put some more money in the bank. I knew inside me that I was using those statements to justify why I was still working as much as I was. Besides, I wasn't ready to lose my identity as work had become who I was, if I left my job, I didn't think the company would survive without my services. That was how I viewed things in my mind and that was my outlook on life back then

When it comes to retirement, and even enjoying life. When you try to sacrifice to pay things down, over a few more years. The end result isn't life changing. Most people will have a tendency to accumulate more bills and debt, and I was that person who did just that. Even if I added funds to the bank account, those funds, over the timeframe of retirement, aren't life changing. If I wanted to start to enjoy life as it is meant to be enjoyed. What I needed to do was an entire lifestyle overhaul, and I was finally ready to do just that. I needed to downsize and simplify my life. You can read about it HERE where my new wife and I go after financial freedom by living a simpler lifestyle and choosing to pursue a side hustle to provide an income source to enhance our lives but will also give us something to do when we wanted.

When I examined the lifestyle I was leading. I realized when I asked myself this one-word question, Why. Why was I going to Starbucks twice a day, or ordering my breakfast and coffee on my way to work at the drive-through. Why did I feel the need to go to a restaurant 4-5 times a week. Why did I have a $1500 cell phone where I only used 10% of its capabilities. Why would I live in a home that is 2400 sqft and only use just 15% of the living space? Why did I subscribe to multiple streaming services that had the same content, which I never watched as I was always working and barely home? Why was I spending a small fortune on designer clothing or even the high-end vehicle sitting in the driveway? The final one, why was I wasting my money, and my life.

Doing the things I listed above, and owning these materialistic items, didn't give me a lifestyle, what it did give me was a burden as I discovered that the more, I acquired and had in my life, the more work that is required to maintain everything, at least in my eyes. I was done with carrying that burden on my shoulders every single day. I found out that once I started scaling back on the so-called lifestyle that I thought I had. I realized I could then afford retirement. The only regret I have right now. I should have acted on retirement or semi-retirement sooner and made it work like I have been doing since 2018.

As I like to say, he who dies with the most toys, is not the winner in life. He who dies with the best memories, truly is the winner in this game called life

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Life Rules for Happiness

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